Independence does not arrive suddenly at one birthday. Choose one area where decision-making can move gradually to the young person: managing an appointment, planning a set amount of money, communicating about a project, or organising a study week. Agree in advance on what they decide alone, what they keep the family informed about, and when they ask for support.
Afterward, review the result without sarcasm. What worked? What needs information or practice? Responsibility becomes real training rather than a test of whether someone is trusted.
Try this week: let the young person plan one part of their week, then discuss it as partners rather than monitor and monitored.